Riordan Retrospective: The Burning Maze

Welcome back to my Riordan Retrospective.  For those just joining the fun, this is my look back at Percy Jackson, its sequels and spin-offs.  This is less of a formal review and more of laid-back retrospective.  Last time we returned to Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard for a look back The Ship of the Dead.  This time we're returning to The Trials of Apollo.  We're taking a look back at The Burning Maze, The Trials of Apollo book 3.  As per usual, let's have a brief summary. 

Things are heating up as Apollo and Meg make their way to Southern California with their new companion Grover Underwood.  California has been hit by a drought of mythological proportions.  Apollo suspects that the third member of the Triumvirate is behind it.  Apollo and his new friends will have to brave the fires of the labyrinth to end the drought and taken down the third emperor.  Apollo is going to need all the help he can get if the third emperor is who he fears it is.  

As per usual, there will be spoilers beyond this point, so turn back now if you don't want that.  If everyone who wants out is gone, let's being.

It isn't even a spoiler that Caligula is emperor number three.  I mean, he was the poster boy for Roman emperors behaving badly.  This book doesn't even cover a fraction of the batshit insane things Caligula did during his reign.  For example, he liked to have sex with his sisters...in public.  He also collected hermaphrodites.  After his first year as emperor he completely blew through the imperial treasury.  So, to raise funds, he murdered wealthy senators and confiscated their money and property.  He constantly threw orgies, both the Roman party kind and the sexual kind, for the poor.  He feared that the poor would revolt if he ever stopped.  He believed his horse to be the reincarnation of Alexander the Great's horse, had it elected to the senate, and forced the priests to declare it a god.  He also had his sisters declared goddesses after he murdered them.  

Eventually, he slapped one of the pretorian guards and called him a naughty word.  The praetorians decided that they'd officially had all they could stand, chased after him, and turned Caligula into a human pincushion.  Caligula's uncle Claudius, who served as a court jester, was hiding behind a tapestry and nearly got killed himself.  However, the praetorians decided he'd be a much better emperor, and Claudius was known as the emperor elected by the praetorian guards.  They turned out to be right, and Claudius widely regarded as the smartest emperor that Rome ever had.  For example, he wrote a multivolume work on the Etruscan people, which was sadly destroyed by Christians.  Claudius was also the emperor who conquered England.  Everyone called him cabbage head, because his face was partially paralyzed after he had a stroke, but his mind remained sharp.  

It really is saying something that Caligula struck fear into Apollo even before he rose to godhood.  Instead of running around, clearly crazy out his head, Caligula comes across as cool and calculating.  This serves to make him even more intimidating.  We'll talk more about Caligula in a minute, but for now let's talk about the other characters. 

First of all, yay, Grover is back at last!  He's only been away for maybe a year or two in-universe, but it sure has felt like forever since we last saw him.  We also get to meet the various dryads and nature spirits that he's been living with.  They're all named after the various types of plants that they are.  Also, Joshua Tree is notable because he's the first male dryad we've ever met.  I also like to think that maybe Aloe Vera was a nod to Vera, the artist Rick hired to make official character portraits for his website.  I loved getting to meet all the new plant characters.  Also, apparently, they love cheese enchiladas just as much as Grover does.  Must be a nature spirit thing.  I wonder if some of them are reverse vegetarians, avoiding plants, but eating all the animal products they like.  Hey, there are carnivorous plants, such as venus fly traps and pitcher plants.  

In other developments, Piper is back, and has gotten knocked on her ass.  She and Jason broke-up, because they didn't have any chemistry when the world isn't in danger.  The Triumvirate has been messing with her dad's finances, saddling him with massive debt, and Mr. McLean his slowly losing his mind.  Piper's not holding up too well herself.  Oh, how the mighty have fallen.  Hey, Piper, remember when you said you wished your dad wasn't rich, and that you could be normal and not live in Malibu?  How's that working out for ya?  As I've said, it feels like Rick is course-correcting with this series, and actually having Piper and Leo fail and get knocked on their asses a few times.  I'm all for it. 

There's even a scene where I almost sympathized with Piper.  Almost, but not quite.  She says that, because Cherokees trace lineage through the mother, she technically isn't a Cherokee.  Doesn't matter that her father is full-blood, or that she's also, for all intents and purposes, full-blood as well.  As Elizabeth Warren infamously discovered, Cherokees don't do the blood percentage thing.  They only care about tracing your lineage.  Obviously, she can't tell the tribal council that her mother is a Greek goddess, at least without getting thrown in a looney bin.  She and her dad are moving to Tahlequah, Oklahoma.  It is the heart of Cherokee culture.  It is the only place where you'll find signs in both English and the Cherokee language. 

Now let's talk about Jason.  Unfortunately, he's still just as perfect as ever.  At times he seemed way too much like Jesus, and I don't mean because he's the son of a god.  He feels like the weight of the world is on his shoulder because of his promise to build shrines and temples to all the gods.  He even keeps a miniature model of where they'll all be placed.  He also weeps because it's just so hard that he can't help everyone at once.  Ugh, I still contend that Percy could have been handled better, but his reaction to Apollo seems way more realistic than Mr. Perfect.  Riordan seemed like he was trying to make Jason's death more impactful, but he overshot the mark, and made Jason seem inhumanly perfect.  We'll get back to his death in a minute. 

So what's Jason been up to lately?  He's attending an elite all-boys private boarding school.  Yeah, if his goal was to be a normal kid, he failed miserably. Most kids don't go to fancy expensive single gender boarding school!  What, did he base his idea of a normal life off of Harry Potter or something?  The fact that he's at an all-boys school really adds fuel to my theory that Jason was originally going to be gay, but Riordan got cold feet.  Hey, he's admitted that he considered making Reyna a lesbian, but was afraid that would play into negative stereotypes.  As in, she was only a lesbian because Percy and Jason rejected her, was the fear.  Make of that what you will.  Also, some have wondered how Jason could have been in the legion since he was a toddler.  Well, a lot of Roman legions used kids are their mascots.  That's what Caligula did when he was a kid.  My guess is he started there and moved up to practical things when he got older.  

As I've said before, Riordan's characters have a bizarre fixation on high school.  Jason used to be the leader of the twelfth legion, a praetor of New Rome, and his goal is to go to high school?  Again, he's forgetting that high school is still school.  It isn't the idealized wonderland he seems to think it is.  There's tests, projects, bullies, and suffering of plenty.  You could say that high school is murder. 

Speaking of which, let's address the elephant in the room: Jason's death.  Well, the madman surprised us yet again.  Riordan killed off one of the seven, and unlike Leo, this time he's playing for keeps.  I never thought I'd see this day.  Jason is gone!  Yes!  Yes!  Yes!  He's toast, he's history!  Caligula did nothing wrong...hmm, there's a sentence I thought I'd never write.  In a way, Caligula is kind of a badass.  He did something that Kronos and Gaea could only dream of: offing one of the seven.  I haven't been this elated in a long, long time.  Overrated Jason is gone for good, and Piper and Leo are reduced to tears.  

One down, two to go.  Come on Ricky boy, off the other two.  You know you want to.  Oh, and while you're at it, let's get rid of Alex and Samirah.  Hey, I can dream can't I.  Of course, we do have to hear the characters moaning and wailing about what a great guy Jason was.  I suspect that we'll be getting a lot of that in The Tyrant's Tomb.  Curse you, Jason Grace!  Even in death you continue to spite me!  

Speaking of deaths, one of the biggest surprises is that Helios appears...sort of.  He's been brought back by Medea and Caligula, but only partially manifested.  Given that it had been previously established that Helios and Selene had faded long ago, I was certainly surprised by this.  Though I've always been a bit baffled by this, given how popular Sol Invictus, Helios' Roman form, was.  It was necessary for Apollo to convince Helios to fade again, but also a bit sad.  It is too bad that he couldn't find a way for Helios to properly manifest, and break free of Medea and Caligula.  

Moving along, we also get some revelations about Meg's past.  Her father was a botanist who was try to revive a group of powerful dryads called the Meliae. He also grew a house, including all the furniture, completely out of living plants.  Naturally, he caught Demeter's eye, and thus Meg was born.  He and Meg were happy with all their plants, but then Nero came along.  It was sad that Hercules, Meg's beloved saguaro cactus, died before he could be reunited with his girl.  Well, at least he never lost faith that she would return.  So, when nature spirits are reincarnated, do they retain memories of their past lives, or are they completely different individuals?  Are they okay with this, or do they feel any injustice that they are denied a proper afterlife?  

On the topic of nature spirits, Coach Hedge and Mellie are back.  They've both mellowed out considerably, probably because they have a son to look after now.  As I've previously stated, Coach Hedge seems to work better when he's only around a few characters, rather than chaperoning a whole group.  We also finally find out why demigods don't use guns.  Turns out that celestial bronze bullets evaporate after they hit their targets.  Since celestial bronze is so rare on Earth, this isn't a good set up.  Plus there's also concern over the monster not being killed by the time the bullets run out.  Some demigods accept these risks, and use guns, but most prefer swords and spears.  

I also enjoyed getting to meet the pandai.  Believe it or not, the Greeks and Romans really did believe the pandai were lurking out there in India.  You should read some of the crazy stuff Herodotus wrote in The Histories.  By the end of the book, Grover feels he's no longer needed thanks to the Meliae, and decides to head by to Camp Half-Blood.  You earned it buddy, and we've all missed you very much.  As per usual, you know I'm going to plug the audiobook version.  Though, from some reason, Robbie Daymond gave Grover a southern accent, despite there being no evidence that he has one.  

Now let's look the cover.  We see Apollo, Meg and Grover traversing the labyrinth.  They're on the run from the fires of Helios, and from a flock of strix.  

Well, I think that covers everything.  Jason is dead, Piper and Leo are miserable, and I can safely say this is one of the happiest endings we've seen in a long time.  Pity that we have to switch gears are review a less than stellar book next time.  Join me again next time when we finish our look back at Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard with a look back at Nine From the Nine Worlds.  I will see you all next time.