The Audio File: Superheroes

Superheroes have certainly become big in recent years. Every year seems to bring even more movies, and television shows, featuring character once found only in the pages of comic books. However, one medium where superheroes are still somewhat underrepresented is prose fiction. That is where this latest edition of The Audio File comes in. We're taking a look at short stories that feature superheroes and supervillains. These stories are brought to us by the folks at Escape Pod, PodCastle, Drabblecast, Lightspeed Magazine, Clarkesworld Magazine, Cast of Wonders, Tales to Terrify, The Overcast, The Truth, and Earbud Theater.

With all of that out of the way, grab your capes and suit up, because it's story time..

Escape Pod

"Nemesis" by Nathaniel Lee
Narrated by Mat Weller
An Escape Pod Original

This story follows high school student Quentin, whose best friend Adam is the superhero Atom Boy. He does he best to help out Adam and be supportive, but secretly he’s always been a little jealous of Adam’s powers. One day Quentin discovers a ring that transforms into a suit of power armor. This could be the chance he’s been waiting for, but what path will he choose?

I liked how this story showed the world of superheroes from a non-superhero perspective; in this case, from the best friend/sidekick’s point of view. I enjoyed Adam’s happy-go-lucky personality and how that contrasted with Quentin’s more down to Earth and conflicted view of things. I shouldn’t give the ending away, but I can say it’s very heartwarming. Nathaniel is one of my favorite writers from Escape Pod, and this story was no exception.

I thought that Mat did a great job with the narration. All in all a great story about superheroes from an average person’s point of view. Very much recommended.

"Origin" by Ari Goelman
Narrated by Veronica Giguere
Originally published in Strange Horizons

Being a expectant parent is always a stressful time, but especially so when you’re a superhero. This story follows Margret aka Ice and Fire, a superhero who has unexpectedly become pregnant, as she and her alien partner Carter do their best to prepare for the baby. Margret finds unexpected help in the form of one of her villains, Dr. Ambrosius Urbinski. However, Dr. U’s assistance might not be an innocent as it seems.

As someone with various potentially genetic issues this story really spoke to me and my fears of what might happen if I ever have kids. It was also interesting how this story examined the potential problems pregnant superhero might encounters; as well as the whole getting pregnant in the first place issue. I also liked how it knowingly winked at some of the more absurd elements, like how Carter, whose eyes lack irises and pupils, can somehow still see even though logically he shouldn’t be able to.

As for the narration, I thought Veronica did an excellent job. It’s another great story I happily recommend.

"Observer Effects" by Tim Pratt
Narrated by A Kovacs
Originally Published in Diet Soup

This story follows a former supervillain who has joined a team of heroes. The team’s leader, Liberator, thinks he can bring world peace by creating machines to allow everyone on Earth to view any one they want any time they want. However, our protagonist isn’t so sure, and before long things go to hell in a hand basket. The protagonist soon finds herself wondering if maybe she should have stayed a villain.

This story is a really great example of capepunk. What is capepunk? Capepunk is a somewhat new punk that explore how superheroes might play out in the real world. It’s unofficially been around since works like Spider-Man and Watchmen, but it’s become something of a trend in prose superhero fiction in recent times.

Anyway, Tim Pratt is the undisputed king of the Escape Artists podcasts, and this was yet another great story of his. He always does a really good job writing strong female characters. Just generally Tim does a really great job. You probably suspect that I’m going to say I liked the narration…and you’d be right.

All in all a great capepunk story from a great writer. Very much recommended.

"Astromonkeys" by Tony Frazier
Narrated by Norm Sherman
Originally Published in Jim Baen’s Universe

This story follows a superhero named Digger bringing his friend Dave to a bar for Dave’s first beer. Digger also recounts how he and Dave first met. A tale that includes chili burgers, green space monkeys, superheroes and much more.

Okay, maybe that sounds a little crazy, but I promise this is a good story. Maybe it is a little crazy, but that’s half the fun. I enjoyed how Digger was something of a working class superhero. I also enjoyed the green space monkeys in this story; because how many other times am I going to be able to write a sentence like that? Norm’s the host of The Drabblecast, more on them momentarily, and obviously he did a top notch job.

A fun little story. Give it a try.

"Origin Story" by Tim Pratt
Narrated by Serah Eley
An Escape Pod Original

This story is told as a one-sided conversation between the narrator and another person. The narrator is the brother of the superhero The Aerialist, and at one time was a big supporter of his brother’s crime fighting. Now, however, he’s out for revenge against The Aerialist.

It’s easy to this story as a meta commentary on the history and movements of the comic book industry. The Aerialist’s adventures start out idealistic and lighthearted, much like comics’ Golden and Silver ages, before getting progressively darker and more cynical. I really enjoy these sort of one-sided conversation stories, and Serah did a great job with the narration. As a bonus, you get to hear the song Skullcrusher Mountain in its entirety after the story.

Another great capepunk story from Tim Pratt. Very much recommended.

PodCastle

"Stranger vs. The Malevolent Malignancy" by Jim C. Hines
A Full Cast Production
Originally Published in Unidentified Funny Objects 2

In this story we follow a superhero named Stranger as he comes to terms with his terminal cancer. Stranger recounts these events to his fellow hero Jarhead. Due to Stranger’s ability to communicate with inanimate objects, his own tumor often cuts in with snarky comments.

Okay, this is another story who’s summary doesn’t do it nearly enough justice. When I listened to this story I was very much reminded of All-Star Superman, both due to the theme of a superhero confronting his own mortality and Stranger being something of a Superman analog. It might seem like some pretty heavy stuff, and the story doesn’t shy away from those themes, but there’s still plenty of humor and lighthearted bits. Hey, it was published in Unidentified Funny Objects 2 after all. One of the things I liked was how Stranger stuck to his morals even we he could have taken the easy way out. True heroes do what’s right even when there’s little to no reward after all.

A full cast production always has an advantage over a single narrator, and that was certainly the case here. It’s a humorous and touching story that I couldn’t recommend more.

"Super-Baby-Moms Group Saves The Day" by Tina Connolly
A Full Cast Production
Originally Published in Unidentified Funny Objects 3

This story is told as a series of emails from an online group for moms, and a few dads, with superpowered kids. At first it’s just typical advice and apologizes, but then things start to get serious when the number of superpowered kids dramatically spikes at the local pre-school. The kids throw a collective temper tantrum and the moms have to intervene to save the day.

Again, the summary doesn’t make it sound like much, but I swear it’s a good story. I liked how this story was presented as a series of emails; it was a nice twist on the short story format. I also enjoyed how this story examined how unpowered parents might deal with their superpowered kids. It’s another one of those funny with a touch of heartwarming stories. As for the narration, the full cast, this one slightly different than the last time, has done it again.

It’s another story I happily recommend.

"Doctor Diablo Goes Through the Motions" by Saladin Ahmed
Narrated by Roberto Suarez
Originally Published in Strange Horizons

This story follows a supervillain named Doctor Diablo as he goes through the motions of a supervillain meeting, and his internal monologue snarks all the way.

Sometimes time is not kind to a story. Case in point, this story. When I first read it I liked it. Upon revisiting it, however, I've noticed several flaws. The main character is pretty much just a mouthpiece for Saladin Ahmed's views. The whole story basically boils down to Dr. Diablos whining about how he became a supervillain because society is racist against minorities, and thus society is to blame. I will concede that certain aspects of America society, such as the War on Drugs, do often unfairly target minorities. I would add the caveat that is an unintentional consequence and not by design.

However, it is also true that many minority communities all too often point the finger at society, rather than accept responsibly and accountability for their own well-being. I've known blacks who grew up in absolute poverty, busted their asses, and made better lives for themselves. Now, I will concede that poverty often does force people into breaking the law. It would have been nice to see this reflected in the story. It would be nice, but that requires nuance and tact; two things Saladin Ahmed lacks in his stories set in the present day. There's also a swipe at superheroes like Iron Fist being "cultural appropriation." That's fairly judgmental coming from a mixed race man, just saying.

What's sad is that I usually enjoy Saladin's work, but tins really is best when he keeps is political opinions to himself. Thumbs down, don't waste your time with this one.

"How to Survive in Room 105" by T. Jane Berry

Narrated by Jen R. Albert

A PodCastle Original

This story follows a superhero who has been sentenced to community service for damaging historical landmarks. She is serving as a substitute teacher for a kindergarten class. Ah, but this isn't an ordinary kindergarten. This is a school for young superheroes. The story is told as a series of directions about how to handle the different students.

This story pairs quite well with "Super-Baby-Moms Group." It was a fun twist to present the story as a series of directions. If you're a teacher, and you feel your students are getting to be a bit much, just listen to this story. You'll feel much better about yourself. Jen's narration also pairs quite well with this story.

Another superhero school story that you won't want to miss. I recommend it.  

The Drabblecast

"Captain Confederation" by Jim Robb
Narrated by Rich Fish
Originally Published in AEscifi.ca

Captain Confederation is one of the top superheroes in Canada. He’s faced many enemies in the path, but now he’s about to take on his great foe yet: government bureaucracy! Various government agency have been putting increasingly stricter regulation on him, and Captain Confederation finds himself considering a move to America.

Superheroes are often thought of as a quintessentially American concept, and it was nice to get a non-American perspective on them. Okay, so maybe Canada isn’t that different, but still. You could easily see this story as an metaphor for all those Canadians who chose to move to America for various reasons. As a bonus you get to hear the song "Magneto and Titanium Man" in its entirety after the story is over.

Rich Fish (yes, his real name) did a spot on job with the narration. A Canadian take on superheroes that I happily recommend.

"The Heroics of Interior Design" by Elise R. Hopkins
Narrated by Veronica Giguere
Originally Published in The Colored Lens #1

This story follows a woman who’s superpower is…the ability to turn anything blue into yellow. She lives in a world filled with heroes possessing more impressive abilities. A protagonist must come to terms with who she is and find her place in this world.

This story is very much about finding your place in the world and coming to terms with who you are. Maybe the protagonist doesn’t have the most impressive powers, but she does her best to make her life meaningful in little ways. That doesn’t mean there isn’t doubts along the way, and by the end she’s done some boarder line illegal things. Still over all it was a pretty good story.

A story about finding meaning in mundane life. I recommend it.

"A Matter of Size" by Robert Jeschonek
Narrated by Norm Sherman
A Drabblecast Original

This story follows Manchild, a member of the Small Wonders superhero team. Someone has been kidnapping members of the team and using them to make snuff film porn. Everyone of them could be marked men, but Manchild, who has the power to turn into a seven year old, has personal interest in this case.

This story is something of a superhero noir, and it was nice to see the mixing of the styles. Though, word of advice, this story contain some potentially heavy subject matter so you might want to listen with the headphones on. The Drabblecast always does such a great job incorporating sound effects and music into their stories, and this one was no exception.

A hard boiled superhero noir that I very much recommend.

"Morton" by Adam Carvin

Narrated by Norm Sherman

A Drabblecast Original

This story follows a man who is picking up his wife's cousin Morton. Morton is a fat, lazy slob with an addiction to anime porn. He's the last person you'd want to receive superpowers, but fate has other ideas.

This story is pretty much an extended joke of sorts. The idea being, what if a complete loser, someone totally unworthy, got superpowers? It certainly makes Morton sound unpleasant. He's basically a walking stereotype of the worst aspects of weeaboos. That is, those who glorify Japan to the detriment of their own nations, and base all their knowledge of Japanese culture on anime and manga. Still, for what this story is, it isn't too bad.

This was one of the earliest Drabblecast episodes, so Norm's narration isn't quite up to the usual standards. Still, all things considered, not too bad. Not the best story, but also far from the worst. It is worth checking out.

Lightspeed Magazine

"Tonight We Fly" by Ian McDonald
Narrated by Paul Boehmer
Originally Published in Masked

This story follows an older former superhero named Chester Banres, formerly Captain Miracle. He longs for the days before he spent most of his time yelling at kids on his lawn. Fortunately, he receives a letter from an old villain of his, Dr. Nightshade, asking to meeting him in the park and fly one last time.

First of all, I have no relations to this Mr. McDonald. Anyway, Ian is from Northern Ireland, and that means more of than non-American perspective on superheroes. It was an interesting choice to make the protagonist an older superhero. It thought that Paul did a great job narrating, as he usually does.

Another non-American take on superheroes that I recommend.

"Origin Story" by Carrie Vaughn

Narrated by Gabrielle De Cuir

This story is set in the same world as Carrie Vaughn's After the Golden Age duology. It follows a woman named Mary who finds herself in the middle of a supervillain bank robbery. She's incredibly shocked to discover that her old boyfriend Jason is now the supervillain Techunter. The story follows them as they reconnect with each other.

Okay, first of all, you don't have to know anything about After the Golden Age in order to enjoy this story. Now then, as I've said before, I always enjoy these stories that examine what it's like to be an average person in a world of superheroes. It had the feel of an Astro City story. That's good, as Astro City is one of my favorite comics. I also liked some of the more mundane details. For example, Mary always dreamed of being an edgy fashion designer and bucking the system. Yet she wound up working for the system instead. Sadly, that's how it goes sometimes. At least she finds new opportunities with Jason.

Once again, Gabrielle does an excellent job with the narration. A story about what it's like to be an average person in a superhero world. I happily recommend it. 

Cast of Wonders

"Random Play All and League to Awesome" by Shane Halbach

Narrated by Justin Thomas James

Originally Published in Oomph: A Little Super Goes aLong Way, and collected in Year's Best YA Speculative Fiction 2013

This story follows a boy named Cyrus and his friends Milo and Rudy. They all have low level superpowers; Cyrus receives premonitions from his MP3 playlist, Milo is good at finding information, and Rudy has the power to never be bored. They're teaming up to investigate Cyrus' mom's business partner, and the strange activity he's been getting up to.

This story was fun from start to finish. It had the feel of those kid hero stories, like the Hardy Boys, but with slightly older protagonists. Admittedly, you could write off our hero's powers as being merely coincidence. Then against, some of Cyrus' playlists certainly seem a little too convenient. Still, not all heroes need powers. Batman for example...was trained in martial arts, has a bunch of gadgets and money. Okay, Batman's not the best example, but the point still stands. Like I said, this story was a joy to listen to from start to finish.

Justin Thomas James' narration was also a joy to listen to. Do I really need to say that I recommend this one?

Clarkesworld Magazine

"Cassandra" by Ken Liu
Narrated by Kate Baker

This story follows a reluctant supervillain with the ability to predict the future. She’s tried to get others to understand her, especially the local superhero Sup…er, I mean, Showboat. At the same times she wonders if she’s actually making a difference or if the future is set in stone.

Ken Liu is one of my absolute favorite writers, and it is always a joy to find a new story of his. So, he’s written a story featuring a superhero with blue tights, a red cape, has the letter S on his chest but the word Superman never appears anywhere in the story. Nice legal gymnastics there Ken. There’s been a few Ken Liu stories questioning if we truly have free will, and I liked that this one didn’t give any solid answers to that tricky question. Also, love the mythology reference in the title; never a bad time for a mythology reference. This story is another great example of the capepunk sub genre.

Now, Clarkesworld is one of those podcasts that only has one narrator, and so things are always a bit hit and miss. Fortunately, thought, Kate did a pretty good job narrating this story. It’s a Ken Liu story, so I kind of new this was going to be great, and it goes without saying that I give this a hearty recommendation.

Tales to Terrify

"Letter to the Editor" by David D. Levine

Narrated by David D. Levine

Originally Published in The Mad Scientist's Guide to World Domination

This story is told in the form of a letter to a newspaper. It is written by a mad scientist named Dr. Talon. He is convinced that the superhero Ultimate Man isn't all that he seems. In fact, he argues that Ultimate Man is putting the world in serious danger simply by his mere existence.

So we've got a story with thinly-veiled versions of Lex Luthor and Superman. Not a complaint, just an observation. It is certainly an interesting twist to see a superhero horror story. I will say that Talon certainly does make a pretty convincing case that Ultimate Man really is an inhuman monstrosity. Still, I wonder if it is a sign of how cynical society has grown that we can't assume someone like Superman really would be all he appears to be, and with no hidden agendas.

David also does an absolutely fantastic job with the narration. A deconstructive superhero horror story that I happily recommend.  

The Overcast

"Stand Up" by Josh Roseman

Narrated by J.S. Arquin

This story follows an autistic boy who has decided to be a superhero. He doesn't have any superpowers, but he has decided to stand up for those in need. The story follows him through his day, and helps a fellow autistic student in need.

I felt that this story captured the mind of an autistic person especially well. As someone who is on the autism spectrum, I always appreciate when stories do that. The protagonist describes things in a very detailed and matte-of-fact sort of way. I've said before about how not all superhero have powers, and I certainly liked the down to Earth feeling of this story. The slice of life aspects were really nice. Don't get me wrong, I do love speculative fiction short stories, but I do wish we had more diversity of genre in the podcast space. Gets some slice of life and down to Earth type stories in there as well.

J.S. Arquin did an exceptionally good job with the narration. A slice of life superhero story that I happily recommend.

The Truth

"Justice Battalion" by Casper Kelly

A Full Cast Production

This story follows a team of superheroes called the Justice Battalion. They fight for Truth, Justice and the American Way. Recently, America has elected a new, and highly controversial, president. Bright Star, the team leader, believes that the president must be stop by and means necessary. He's evening willing to kill the president and overthrow the government. The other members must stop him before it is too late.

This episode had some strong Silver Age vibes to it. In particular, you can tell that Super Friends was a pretty big influence. The main characters are also thinly-veiled stand-ins for the Justice League. Bright Star is Superman, Night Wolf is Batman, and Captain Kilowatt is Wonder Woman. They even fight a Joker analogue named Crying Clown. The only member without an obvious counterpart is Silicon Savior. Though he is a robot like Red Tornado.

Still, even amidst the silliness, there is a deeper message. The message seems to be, even if you disagree with the current government, that doesn't justify killing or resorting to drastic measures. The humor and parody help the message go down smoother. I also appreciated that the humor never got too self-referential or self-indulgent. It was like Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice, but with much better writing.

The voice acting is absolutely phenomenal. Erica Schoeder does a pitch perfect rendition of the Super Friends version of Wonder Woman. Likewise, Marc Thompson gives a great performance as Night Wolf. Kind of a combination of Christian Bale and Diedrich Bader's takes on Batman. Billy Bob Thompson sounds exactly like Mark Hamill's take on Joker. Great performances all around.

A fun and humorous story complete with a deeper message. I can't recommend it enough.

Earbud Theater

"Pete the Creature" by Nicholas Thurkettle

A Full Cast Production

This story follows two girls named Mala and Evel. They are students at a school for supervillains. They're competing in the school's upcoming mad science fair. They're planning on creating a creature, but the strains of competition may also strain their friendship.

This was the first episode of Earbud Theater that I ever listened to, and is still one of my favorites. They're great juxtaposition in this story. One second it sounds like a typical school story, and then you get a reminder that the main characters are at a school for supervillains. There's also a great message about how winning isn't everything, and you shouldn't let competition consume you. This is slightly underminded given the nature of the twist at the end, but I won't spoil that for you.

Great performances all around from the cast. Another fun story that I'll happily recommend to you.

Conclusion

So here we are at the end of the list once again. My schedule has cleared and I should be able to get these to you more often. I know I say that a lot, but still. Like always, I hope you're all enjoying this as much as I am. Without anything else to say, I will see you all next time. 

The Audio File: Feast of Fiction

It’s often said that good fiction is a feast for the imagination. In today’s edition of The Audio File we’re going to take that saying a bit more literally. All of our stories will be about food, drink and sharing a meal. I could talk about the significance of food and drink throughout speculative fiction, and literature in general. After all, sitting around a fire and sharing a meal with friends is one of the oldest traditions of humanity. However, I thought it would be more fun if we set the table using our imaginations.

Imagine you and I are sitting down for dinner at Chez Audio File. It is a fancy upscale restaurant renowned for the succulent audio offerings. The other patrons are spacemen, wizards, aliens, dragons, superheroes and anything else you can imagine. Our favorite drinks have been poured in our glasses and I have made an order for the restaurant’s finest offerings. Our meal has been prepared by some of the finest writers I have been able to find, and they’re cooking just for us.

Before long a team of waiters arrives at our table with steaming silver domes. With mounting anticipation the first dome is opening and our feast of fiction begins…

The Drabblecast

“A Memory of Seafood” by Tina Connolly
Narrated by Angela Lee
Originally Published in Yog’s Notebook

This story follows a futuristic travel writer who recounts a visit to the planet named Estplanet. It’s a marshy world with lots of rain, and more than a bit of strife between the locals, but the food is amazing. So she stops by a seafood restaurant run by two chefs from both of the feuding species. The meal is great, but what was that banging noise from the kitchen?

Yeah, I think you’ve probably pieced together by now that the thumping noise was one of the chefs getting murdered and cooked. To make matters worse he was apparently the most amazing thing the protagonist ever ate. Personally I kind of saw this story as allegory for the vegetarian vs. omnivore debate. True, farmed animals do often live in harsh conditions and they are often rather cute. On the other hand, meat is rather tasty and it is a good source of nutrition. All I’m saying is there’s shades of gray to go around, though I personally am omnivorous.

I’d like to take this opportunity to state that I do not condone the killing and eating of humans or other sentient species. I’d also like to take this opportunity to say that Angela did a really great job with the narration. A somewhat darkly humorous story that makes for a great first course. I very much recommend it.

“Local Delicacies” by Fran Wilde
Narrated by Lauren Synger
A Drabblecast Original

This story follows Besha, the manager of the El Corazon restaurant on the Vegas Strip. Besha often has to keep her boss Danny, who has a bit of a gambling problem, from completely ruining the restaurant. One day an alien named Xlot arrives and says Danny has betted that El Corazon is the best restaurant on Earth. A group of slug aliens are on their way to judge the contest. Besha’s in for the craziest shift of her life.

This was a really funny story just because of how over-the-top it got. I’ve never worked in the food industry before, but I imagine this story captured the feelings of stress and chaos those who do feel. I particularly liked the scene where the health inspector shows up, and how the characters took care of him. The little audio quirks really helped moved the story along, such as the record scratch at particularly incredulous moments. Speaking of audio, I thought that Lauren handled the narration quite well.

A humorous story that serves as a great pallet cleanser after heavy reading. Very much recommended.

“The Carnival Was Eaten, All Except the Clown” by Caroline M. Yaochim 
Narrated by Norm Sherman
Originally Published in Electric Velocipede

This story is about a sugar clown who has been created by a magician to be the leader of his candy carnival. It is the clown’s job to generate the other members of the carnival and instill them with joy that they are to be eaten at children’s birthday parties. Admittedly, she isn’t quite sure what it means to be eaten for she never gets to go to the parties. That all changes one day when she goes to spy on her crush, the gingerbread daredevil. What will the sugar clown do with this horrible revelation?

It would have been very easy to play this story for some very dark comedy. Therefore, the fact that Caroline played this story completely straight and have it work really shows her skills as a writer. I know we’re supposed to sympathize with the clown, and for the most part I did, but the descriptions of the candy carnival made it sound really tasty. Plus who wouldn’t have wanted something like that when they were a kid for their birthday? The writing itself has a very rhythmic and poetic quality to it.

Norm really nailed it with his narration. It’s a story that’s short, sweet and to the point.

“Ghost in the Coffee Machine” by Charity Tahmaseb
Narrated by Veronica Giguere
A Drabblecast Original

This story follows a ghost hunter named Katy who catches ghosts in a magic coffee machine passed down from her grandmother. Things had been going well, but now she’s got competition from a ghost hunter named Malcolm who uses a Persian tea samovar. It seems like Katy’s out of business, but a few ghosts in the machines could change all of that.

I guess you could kind of describe this story as Ghostbusters, but as a romantic-comedy with lots of coffee. Personally I’m surprised that it didn’t occur to Katy to team-up with Malcolm sooner. You gotta figure she must have encountered a ghost who didn’t like coffee at some point. I know that would be an issue if I were a ghost that needed to be captured. Then there’s the question of what to do when a ghost doesn’t like coffee or tea, but maybe I’m overthinking things. The story kind of reminded me of how Danny Phantom caught ghosts with his…well it wasn’t quite magical but it was a thermos.

Veronica’s narration certainly managed to capture my attention. All in all it’s a good little story that I give a recommendation.

Cast of Wonders

“The Rum Cake Runner” by Jessi Cole Jackson
Narrated by Michelle Ristuccia
Originally Published in Crossed Genres Magazine

This story takes place on the planet New Rio where sugar is a contraband substance. Nesi De Luca is a member of an Italian family who operate an illegal sweets bakery out of their home. Her job is to make deliveries for their various clients without getting caught. Little does Nesi know she’s about to make one of the biggest runs of her life.

Well first of all I thought that this was a fun little story. Having said that I had a few hang-ups with it. I guess my biggest one would be why is sugar banned on New Rio? I know Jessi was trying to draw parallels with Prohibition, but that ended after a few years whereas the sugar ban is implied to have been going on for generations. Surely there was a revolt at some point in New Rio’s history? On the other hand, maybe that goes to show possible dystopian undertones to New Rio’s government?

The name of the planet itself seems to suggest that it was colonized by Brazilians, but we don’t really see any in the story. Then again, Brazil is a fairly diverse nation, so perhaps its off-world colonies follow suit. There was like one racial slur in the story, but Nesi gets immediately reprimanded for using it. It didn’t bother me, and I think that Cast of Wonders really overdid it with their explanation of why it was included. Guys, we get it. Racism sucks, but you’re a young adult podcast. Young adults can handle that sort of stuff without being mollycoddled.

In terms of narration I thought that Michelle did a stellar job. I don’t want you to walk away thinking that I didn’t like this story. Despite its flaws I quite enjoyed it and I still give it a recommendation.

“Lizzy Viscera and the Quest for the Perfect Sandwich” by Spencer Koelle
Narrated by Danielle Daly
A Cast of Wonders Original

This story follows a college student/necromancer named Lizzy Viscera. She likes to eat different things for breakfast and dinner, but she likes her lunches to be consistent. She tries to make herself the perfect sandwich. Unfortunately, she’s all out of mayonnaise, and so Lizzy embarks on an epic quest to complete her sandwich before her next class begins.

I loved the way this story juxtaposes Lizzy’s cheerful and sunny personality next to some of the darker aspects of necromancy. For example, Lizzy uses a spellbook bound in human skin and written in blood and rides a flaming skeleton horse, all while being a slightly chubby blonde girl with rainbow streaks in her hair. Spencer has stated that he did this deliberately so that he could write about a female necromancer who wasn’t a stereotypical goth girl in a skull bra. I remember how hectic my first year of college was, so I can relate to Lizzy’s desire to beat the clock and get some decent lunch.

In terms of narration I thought that Danielle did a great job brining to story to life. It’s a fun little story that’s sure to liven up your day.

"The Four Stewpots" by DK Thompson
Narrated by Tina Connolly
Collected in And Welcome Back

This story takes the form of a Yelp review. She recently took her daughter to a new restaurant called The Four Stewpots. Her daughter loved it, but she though it had something to be desired. The stews claim to be made of things such as kraken and leviathan, and the waiters are dressed as creatures in surprisingly convincing costumes. Her daughter also talks about going on adventures with pirates, and where did she get those new clothes?

This was another really fun story. There's clearly some magical stuff happening, but the mother can't see it. Maybe it could be seen as a metaphor  for how kids are more open to new things and experiences, while adults tend to be more set in their ways. That or maybe the mother is so focused on the mundane and the day-to-day that she's forgotten how to dream. I liked how the story took the form of a review, and mixed up the style of a typical story.

Once again, Tina does an excellent job with the narration. A short but satisfying story that I'm sure that you'll enjoy. 

Escape Pod

“Thanksgiving Day” by Jay Werkheiser
Narrated by Paul Haring
Originally Published in Analog

This story follows a group of colonist on a planet in the Tau Ceti system. Their crops haven’t been growing in the native soil, and local plants contain dangerously high levels of blood-thinners. The food supply is getting lower by the day and the colony is teetering on the edge of an all-out civil war. Can a good source be found in time to prevent disaster?

I was considering saving this one for my post about space colonization, but at its heart this is a story about the quest for food. Therefore, I figured it would fit in pretty well here. Navigating biochemical barriers is always a concern when colonizing other worlds, as are the different paths that evolution may have taken. I did find it a bit odd that the colonists had a ship that got them to Tau Ceti in ten years and artificial wombs for cloning rats, yet they still used manual labor rather than using robots. Of course, if they had those then it might have meant no story.

It was nice to see a story about two different groups of people learning to set aside their differences to solve a problem. It was also nice to hear Paul’s narration of the story. It’s a science fiction take on the story of Thanksgiving, and one you won’t want to miss out on.

“The Love Quest of Smidgen the Snack Cake” by Robert T. Jeschonek 
Narrated by John Cmar
Originally Published in Space and Time Magazine

This story is set in the not too distant future in which all foods have limited AI capability. That means that items in a grocery store will do everything in their power to talk you into buying and eating them. The story follows a chocolate snack caked named Smidgen as he tries to convince a woman named Linda that he’s the snack she’s been desiring all along.

Smidgen can get fairly suggestive at times, but overall nothing too inappropriate happens in this story. That having been said, it certainly brings a new meaning to the phrase “food porn.” The scary part about this is that I can totally see this happening. Companies are always looking for new ways to push their products onto the public, and they’d probably leap at an opportunity like this. I’m not sure how the FDA would feel, but money certainly goes a long way with that sort of thing.

To pull off a story like this you need a good narrator, and Paul more than delivers in that regard. It a fun and slightly sexy story with a sweet ending. Very much recommended.

Pseudopod

“It’s Easy to Make a Sandwich” by S.L. Bickley
Narrated by Ben Phillips
A Pseudopod Original

This story follows a young man who is a bit down on his luck. Life has dealt him more than a few knocks and he now finds himself working a dead-end job at a sandwich restaurant that is most likely a Subway. One day he decides to liven up his life by deliberately poisoning his customers.

I know that isn’t much for a description, but it isn’t that long of a story. It might no be a long story, but it is a very effective story. Whenever we go to a restaurant we put a certain amount of trust that those behind the counter won’t try to harm us. As this story show, if they wanted to, those in the service industry to do quite a bit of damage before anyone noticed. Though if you think that’s bad you might want to look at all the stuff the frequently goes on behind the scenes in the fast food world. It’s enough to make you swear the stuff off for good.

The story may be stomach-churning, but Ben’s narration goes down smooth. It’s a story that’ll have you thinking twice about where your food comes from. It’s also one I readily recommend.

“Raw Appetite” by Christa Pagliel
Narrated by Brian Rollins
Originally Published in Fictionvale’s Kitchen Sink

This story follows a culinary student who is living in Paris and studying under Chef Catalan, one of the finest chefs in all of France. One day Catalan take our protagonist into his confidence and unveils his latest plan. One of their finest customer’s is about to move away, and Chef wants to throw a farewell dinner so that he can murder the customer and cook his flesh into a delicious dish.

Again, the summary doesn’t sound like much but I promise it’s a good story. It kind of has a Ratatouille meets Sweeney Todd vibe to it. If there is a theme throughout this story it’s about the dangers of letting your passions consume you and going too far in pursuit of your art. The scene where they dispose of the customer’s car was kind of unintentionally funny. They find a series of fast food wrappers and Chef reacts as if he just discovered that his lover was having an affair. Though I suppose, from a certain perspective, that’s what it was.

The story may leave a bad taste in your mouth, but Brain’s narration is pleasing to the ears. A cautionary tale about raw passion gone wrong, and one that is very much recommended.

PodCastle

“Help Summon the Most Holy Folded One!” by Harry Connolly 
A Full Cast Production 
Originally Published in Help Fund My Robot Army! and Other Improbable Crowdfunding Projects

This story is told as a series of Kickstarter posts. It follows two former Chipotle employees as they try to raises funds to summon the great taco god Tacothulhu. He is the holder of filling and the feeling that is held. They claim that Tacothulhu will unveil the secret to the perfect taco to them. Hilarious commentary occurs along the way.

If you hang around Kickstarter enough you’ll probably run into something very similar to this story. Though to my knowledge no real world Kickstarters have ever actually summoned a Lovecraftian taco deity. It was funny seeing the various ways the duo attempted to pitch their wild scheme to the masses, and that their taco religion had experienced a schism at some point. It was also rather humorous that the character True American was obviously voiced by a New Zealander.

Speaking of the narration, I thought everyone involved in the production did an amazing job. There not really much more I can add other than that this is a fun little story you won’t want to miss out on.

"Recipe: 1 Universe" by Effie Seiberg
Narrated by Wilson Fowlie
Originally Published in Galaxy's Edge 

This story is told in the form of a recipe for how to cook a universe into creation. Briefer description than usual, but this is a flash fiction story. I always like story that are told in an unusual format, such as a recipe. There's tons of little references to what science knows about the early formation of the universe scattered throughout the story. For example, one of the steps mentions that the universe will look orange in the early stages. Cosmologists do indeed believe that the early universe had an orange color to it.

As is usual, Wilson does an excellent job with the narration. A fun little story where you might even learn something. I recommend it. 

Lightspeed Magazine

“Observations About Eggs from the Man Sitting Next to Me on a Flight from Chicago, Illinois to Cedar Rapids, Iowa” by Carmen Maria Machado
Narrated by Stefan Rudnicki

This story…well, the title really says it all. It’s told as a series of observations an old man makes to a young woman sitting next to him on a flight. He waxes on about the many magical qualities of eggs and the mysteries contained within them.

Okay, that’s not much of a description but…well, I assume you know the drill by now. I think we’ve all met the old man in this story at some point in our lives. It makes the story relateable. Plus the story is just pure unwatered down fun. In terms of narration Stefan does the same great job that he always does.

Not much more to add other than that this story is more than worthy of your time.

"Taste the Singularity at the Food Truck Circus" by Jeremiah Tolbert
Narrated by Paul Boehmer

This story takes place in Kansas City in the not too distant future. Nico is an accountant with a love of food, and he's just run into his old cooking class buddy Alberto. Alberto is part of a secret group of food truck chefs who use science to make fantastical new culinary creations. He's about to give Nico a golden ticket to a world of pure imagination.

This was a really fun story. Jeremiah was clearly trying to invoke Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, and he certainly succeeded in this regard. There was so many amazing and wondrous things at the food truck circus.  I think my favorite was the Kaiju Experience. It's like a Godzilla movie where you get to play Godzilla. You get to stomp around a gingerbread city full of gummy people who run around and scream. Then, at the very end, a cotton candy atomic bomb gets dropped on you. I also loved spaghetti on a stick.  It's a 3D-printed spaghetti wrapped around a 3D-printed breadstick.  Simple, yet sounds delicious. There's also mention of soup on a stick; I just gotta know how that one works. Interesting, 3D-printed food is a thing that exists in our world, but isn't nearly as good as the food featured in this story. There's also these mechanical tapeworm things that convert the calories from the food into charge for you phone and bio-implants. I gotta get some of those in my life.

As per usual, Paul does an excellent job with the narration. Why are you still reading this? Go out and listen to this wonderful story.

Tales to Terrify

"Dining with the Devil" by Arthur Davis
Narrated by Drew Sebesteny
Originally Published in Allegory Magazine

This story follows a waiter in an upscale restaurant in New York City. One day, a customer comes in who, by all accounts, appears to be the Devil himself. He asks for a cooked human soul. Our protagonist is even more surprised when the head chef actually produces the cooked soul. Just what is going on here?

I guess the Devil is a big fan of soul food. Well puns aside, I really enjoyed this story. Apparently, the head chef comes from a village in rural Spain that was hit bad by a plague. The Devil agreed to spare the village if the chef's family cooked souls whenever he asked for them. Of course, this raises the question of where the chef gets the souls, and how they are harvested. Strangely enough, the description of the cooked souls sounded rather tasty, as did all the other descriptions of the various foods.

I also enjoyed Drews narration. A devilishly delectable story that you won't want to miss out on.

Mr. CreepyPasta

"A Gifted Chef" by Max Lobdell
Narrated by Mr. CreepyPasta
Originally Published in Unsettling Stories 

This story follows a man whose next door neighbor is a professional chef. The chef always whips-up amazing smelling dishes, and the two soon strike-up a friendship. Then, one day, our narrator smells a particularly alluring scent coming from his neighbor's house. Except that it's been several days since he's seen his neighbor.

To discuss why I liked this story I'm going to have to give away the ending. Cannibalism creepypastas are a dime a dozen. Usually, the protagonist will discover some fabulous new mystery meat, but wouldn't you know, it turns out to be human flesh. This story looks like it's setting up to be another of these, but then subverts it. Turns out the chef got drunk and died in his indoor hot tub, and the mysterious smell was his flesh being cooked by the hot water. I love it when stories surprise me like that.

A story that subverted my expectations, and one that I happily recommend.

Strange Horizons

“The Witches of Athens” by Lara Elena Donnelly
Narrated by Anaea Lay

This story takes place in Athens. Athens, Ohio that is! It follows a pair of witch sisters who each run their own diner. The sister on Court Street is beautiful and runs a very flashy diner, while the sister on Union Street has a more working class look and her diner is more down to Earth. Despite their differences they often work together to help those around them. The story follows their attempt to play match makers with two gay men.

I really liked the way that magic in this story was based around different foods. For example, scrambled eggs and jalapeño burgers give you the ability and courage to speak up. It was also nice that the two witches were still close despite their differences. Admittedly I was a little disappointed that this story didn’t have anything to do with Greek Mythology, but the story I got more than made up for it. All things considered it’s a really sweet and heartwarming story.

I give it a hearty recommendation.

Apex Magazine

“Soul of Soup Bones” by Crystal Lynn Hilbert
Narrated by Wendy Bowlsby

This story follows a necromancer named Adrienne. She has revived the famous necromancer named Jacoben Stoyan. She expects that he’ll be a fountain of knowledge, but all Jacoben does is cook all day. Could the nonstop cooking be the key to it all?

Well what I can I say without giving it all away? It’s a fun and lighthearted story. It’s another one of those stories that combines necromancy and cooking. The descriptions of the food were mouth-watering. Wendy’s narration was spot on.

Uh…why don’t you go ahead and check the story out for yourself.

Conclusion

Ah, wasn't that a lovely meal we just enjoyed? A true feast for the imagination. Well, the bill has been payed for, everyone has their doggie bags, and it is time for us to leave the restaurant. I hope that you will return to The Audio File again some time. There are many more great stories to discover across a wide range of subjects. Do be careful on your trips back home, and I will see you all again next time.