The Audio File: Bite-Sized Broadway Part 2

Welcome back to my review of Bite-Size Broadway. If you're looking for part 1, it’s over here. This was originally a one-part review, but I split it up to make reading easier.

Bite-Sized Broadway is an anthology of mini-musicals. Each musical differs in style, music, and length. Shows run anywhere from seventeen to thirty-two minutes. The remaining time is spent on an interview with the creators of the musicals. The interviews are conducted by Jonathan Lynch. I was first made aware of Bite-Sized Broadway when I was contacted by Andrew Fox on Reddit. He's the sound engineer for the podcast, and is responsible for coordinating the musical scores in each episode. He's also an alumnus from Team StarKid. Team StarKid were an indie theatre troop who produced several parody musicals beloved across the Internet and beyond. Andrew had read some of my previous review I posed in r/audiodrama, and asked if I'd be willing to take a look at Bite-Sized Broadway. I said yes, and now here we are.

As you'll recall from last time, I absolutely adore the theme song that plays at the beginning and ending of each episode. Each episode has their own personalized posters, and they're all great. In fact, if you listen on Spotify, the image you get will be each episode’s poster, rather than the series title card. But we're getting off-track. To the next musical we go.

The sixth musical is The Trial of Bastiano di Bologna. It takes place at the Vatican in the 8th Century. Bastiano di Bologna, the loyal personal assistant of the Pope, has been brought to trial. He is accused of sneaking into the Pope's chambers and attempting to murder the Pope. Bastiano, however, contends that he is innocent. He claims that he witnessed a tiny arm sticking out from under the Pope's miter. Moreover, he claims that there is a tiny man living under the Pope's miter.

Just as a point of clarification. Miters are those funny looking hats that bishops wear. Aaron Jensen said that he got the idea for this musical when he was reading a story in The Weekly World News. It's a parody newspaper along the lines of The Onion. The story he read was about how a second pope was discovered under the Pope's hat. So, he grew the story from there. So, this story isn't based on any actual, or purported, trails within the Vatican. It's not aiming to be historically accurate, hence why the music is so anachronistic for the 8th Century.

Well, we start off with some Gregorian Chant, which would have been accurate for the time period. After that, we quickly transition to a more operatic style of music. In particular, I was reminded of the opera Don Giovani. We start of light and airy with wind instruments, and then get darker and more dramatic, which pipe organ for accompaniment. In particular, the part where the Tribunale tells Bastiano that his fate is sealed reminded me of the end of Don Giovanni. Also, as an aside, we got a surprise appearance by Andrew Fox as a member of the Tribunale. This is rather amusing, given that Andrew is Jewish.

The ending makes pretty good use of the audio-only medium. The Pope is called forward and has his miter removed. We hear everyone gasp, and then the musical ends. So, we never find out if there was a little man under the miter or not. Aaron says he leaves it up to the listeners to decide for themselves. Personally, the impression I got was that there was indeed a tiny pope.

But in more concrete details, I do know that The Trial of Bastiano di Bologna is an excellent mini-musical, and I happily recommend it. It's a historical-ish musical with some fun twists.

Our seventh musical is MTA: The Musical. It's a hot summer day on the New York City subway. Three very different people are standing on the platform waiting for their train. The train keeps getting delayed, and the heat keeps rising. We follow the inner thoughts and internal monologues of all three people as they go on a rollercoaster of emotions while waiting for the train.

I took a two-and-a-half-week trip Washington DC the summer before a graduated from college. It was a walking tour of the city that counted for class credit, and had plenty of free time. As such, I frequently used the Washington Metro subway. It was clean, modern, had plenty of air conditioning, was full of friendly and helpful people, and the train lines were all very easy to navigate. I bring this up because, based on what I've heard, the New York City Metro is the exact opposite of all those things. It probably helps that the Washington Metro frowns upon allowing food and drink, other than water and maybe coffee, onto the trains and into the station. I think I still have my metro card in my wallet, come to think of it. No, I didn't feel any schadenfreude listening to this musical. Why ever do you ask?

Peter Saxe and Christopher Michaels first conceived of this musical as a short film and a live show. They would be ten minutes long and feature no dialogue, other than the occasional announcement over the PA system. All other noises would be the sort ambient noises you might hear on a subway platform. The story would conveyed entirely thought the body language of the actors, to the point that the characters didn't even have names. Obviously, it would be pretty much impossible to do this in a non-visual medium, so this led to the plot being carried by the characters inner thoughts instead. Though, the characters are still unnamed, just like in the original proposal.

Our first song is called, fittingly enough, "MTA." It an upbeat opening number...about how much the three characters hate the MTA. They sing about how there's no air conditioning, cellphone reception is terrible, it's dirty and full of really big rats, among other things. I loved the contrast between the upbeat music and the extremely negative lyrics. It's a good opening number. Also, I definitely did not giggle and chuckle as I marveled at how much better the Washington Metro is. Yep, that totally did not happen.

Next, we have "Look At That." Everyone's frustration with the subway turn to sexual frustration as they ogle each other. They even hallucinate the PA system saying sexy things. Speaking only for myself, I don't usually think sexy thought when the temperature rises. I usually think something along the lines of "damn it, why is it so damn hot?!" I've also never ogled anyone on a subway. Though, that was probably because the experience was still so novel, and I was thinking about the fun things I'd see at various museums. If I had to ride the subway every day for work, I get the feeling the novelty would wear-off pretty quickly. But I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be thinking about banging the other passengers. Hey, all I'm saying is that another stereotype I've hear of the New York subway is that people are always masturbating on it. This was another song were the disconnect between the lyrics and the music worked to great effect.

Our third song is "Something More." It's a slow, and surprisingly touching, song where the characters sing about how they don't want to be alone. They're lonely, and they just want to find that special someone. The woman likes the second man, but he's gay and likes the first man, but first man likes the woman, who thinks he's a total meathead. Yeah, even before the love triangle was official revealed in the second song, I saw it coming a mile away. It was pretty obvious based on the mix of people we had. Still, while predicable, the actors all gave great performances. This song was also great at conveying its point about the characters.

Our final song is "MTA (Reprise)". It starts off slower, but then speeds up again towards the end. The characters sing about the MTA suck, but what are you going to do about it? Complaining won't make the train come fast, and at the end of the day, they all need the MTA for one thing or another. And hey, their patience is rewarded. Godot, and by that, I mean the train, finally arrives. Psych! It plows past the station and they're left still waiting, and frustrated as ever.

And so that was MTA: The Musical. It was another shorter musical, but it was still plenty of fun. It got plenty of laughs from me, and even managed to have genuinely touching moments. Chalk another one up for excellent mini-musicals. 

Our eighth musical is Sheila the Tiny Turtle. Sheila is a turtle who lives with her family in the Australian Outback. She wants to do big things, but everyone thinks she’s too small. Then, her mother falls ill, and nothing can cure her. Sheila hears that the seeds of the desert quandong tree might be able to cure her mother. However, the path to the tree is far from easy, and danger lurks around ever corner. Undeterred, Sheila sets out into the wilderness to save her mother.

Those of your who have read my review of the audio drama Yowie will recall that I had a love for all things Australia in my younger days. I still have a certain fondness for the Land Down Under. So, this musical had my attention from the start. This is a great musical to share with kids, but that’s no surprise. Caitlyn Burt and Amir Shoenfeld wrote this musical by consulting a children’s book containing folktales from around the world. They liked a Mexican story about the trickster Coyote. However, due to neither of them being Mexican, they felt uncomfortable doing a straight adaption. So, they decided to recast the story in one of their homelands; Australia for Caitlyn and Israel for Amir. They chose Australia due to it have more interesting animals than Israel.

I’ve done something similar. I’ve retold the Japanese folktale of Urashima Taro, but in 19th Century Shreveport, Louisiana. I’ve also retold the Jewish folktale The Golem of Prague, but set in 19th Century South Carolina. In fact, the very first version of The Golem of Prague that I ever read was set in the Roman Empire. You can find both of my stories over on The Moonlit Road.

Before we get into the songs, I just have to ask, why would a family of sea turtles be living in the Australian Outback? The Outback is about as far as you can get from the ocean in Australia. It just makes no sense. The cover art seems to indicate that Sheila and her family are sea turtles. I realize this is a minor issue, but it matters to me. Anyway, enough about that, onto the music.

Our opening song is called, well, “Opening.” It is a rousing folk/country song as Sheila’s brothers sing about how they work hard to provide for their mother, and diss Sheila for being little and weak. The song grows softer and slower as Sheila decide to embark on her dangerous quest. This was an interesting song. I’ve listened to a fair bit of folk music from around the Anglosphere, and I’ve come to appreciate how country music evolved out of folk music. Sometimes the line between the two gets a bit blurred. I got hints of both in this song, but I guess that make sense. Australia is a former British colony, like America, and draws from the same musical tradition. Well, the same initial musical tradition. Country music in America has strong African-American influences as well, but I digress.

The next song is “Offspring Just Spring Off.” Sheila meets some friendly kangaroos, and saves a joey named Ned from an eagle. Ned’s mother, however, is worried about how far Sheila is from home. Mrs. Kangaroo sings a bouncy song about how all mothers, no matter what species, make sure their children are safe and protected. Well, it is certainly fitting that the bouncy song was sung by a kangaroo. We also get to hear lots of fun Australian slang. That, or Sheila and the kangaroos were struck by a sudden bout of aphasia. That was a joke, just to be clear. I actually did enjoy hearing all the slang, and trying to pick-out the bits I was familiar with.

Song number three is called “Dingo.” Funnily enough, this one involves Sheila bumping into a hungry dingo. This one starts off menacing and threatening. I can practically see the hungry dingo circling around poor Sheila. Then, it switches to happy and jaunty as Sheila tricks the dingo into doing her bidding for her. See, Sheila, your mother was right. You are clever, and that’s your greatest strength. Hmm, I guess this is were the influences from the original story of Coyote come in. A great song, I have no complaints.

“Finale” is a reprise of the opening song, but this time Sheila’s brothers are singing her praise. The moral of this musical, if it wasn’t obvious, is that physical strength isn’t everything. There’s always a solution for those clever enough to find it. Sometimes, you just have to persevere. Not much more to say, other than that it was a good note to end on.

And so that was Sheila the Tiny Turtle. A great mini-musical for listeners of all ages. A good place to start if you want to introduce kids to musical theatre.

Our final musical for this season is titled RansomWHERE? This one follows a little old lady who isn’t very knowledgeable about computers. We’ll call her Grandma. Unfortunately, Grandma has been tricked into downloading some ransomware, named AIDA, onto her computer. She has seventeen minutes before it deletes all of her photos. Grandma recruits the help of her grandson Thomas, and together they must find a way to outwit AIDA before it is too late.

My family has had to deal with something very similar to this musical. My paternal grandfather got tricked into giving his personal information to scammers. It took my dad quite a bit of time to get that sorted out. My mom says that there is a special place Hell for people who try to take advantage of the elderly. We had some similar issues with my maternal grandmother. There were certain parts of this musicals where I wasn’t sure if I should laugh or cry. Just to be clear, I did very much enjoy this musical. It was a strong note to end the season on. This also is a special musical, because it is written by Bite-Size Broadway host Jonathan Lynch, along with Eric Gruin and Gil Varod. Well, not much more to add, so let’s get into it.

Our first song is called “You’ll Never See Your Memories Again.” We get lots of electronic and techno notes. That’s to be expected by for a song sung by a computer program. We do get some hints from more conventional interments. I detected some saxophones, trumpets, flutes, and drums among other things. This was almost like a techno/electronic version of “Billing Codes” from Blue Cross Blues. My only complaint is that AIDA’s voice, with its electronic echo, got very annoying very quickly. I’m pretty sure this is intentional, but it was still rather irritating at times.

The second song is “Computers Like You More Than They Like Me.” This one is a tango/salsa number where Grandma pleads for Thomas to help her. It sure was nice of Thomas to agree to help Grandma. He was hard at work contributing to society and…I’m just kidding. Turns out, he was in Grandma’s basement playing video games. He’s a Princeton graduate, but hey, finding a job can be hard in today’s economy. Or maybe he makes money streaming. Hey, it could happen.

Song three is titled “It Can Hear Us.” This one reminded me of “Pay the Bill” from Blue Cross Blues. The music is almost exactly identical. It could be coincidence, but the parallels are uncanny. AIDA has the ability to listen to Grandma and Thomas, and can turn up the computer’s microphone sensitivity way higher than it should. Thomas is baffled, and Grandma thinks that the machine uprising has begun. Frankly, I’m kind of included to agree with Grandma. What if AIDA crashes the economy, or launches the nukes, or (horror of horrors) deletes Grandma’s TiVo recordings?! It was funny when Thomas tries to whisper, but Grandma loudly blurts out everything Thomas is doing.

We end things with “Finale.” Grandma and Thomas crack AIDA and track it back to a nine-year-old boy in Belarus name Alex. Turns out, he made AIDA because he was bored, more than anything. Oh, and he need money to buy sneakers to impress a girl he likes. Grandma sings about the good old days when people went outside and connected with real people in real life. She pleads with Alex to stop messing with people on the Internet, and instead go outside. In fact, Thomas suggests that he and Grandma go outside and enjoy themselves.

Well this was a fun song to end on. It was fun, but reality was not kind to this song. As of this writing, we are experiencing yet another spike of COVID-19. Please get your vaccinations, if you haven’t done so already. So, Grandma and Thomas might not even be able to go outside. But maybe that’s for the best. Grandma sings of her fun youth activities, such as setting trees on fire, pulling the family dog’s tail, and crushing frogs with her bare hands. Yeah, Thomas might want to keep Grandma far away from any matches or lighters. The more time they spend fooling with technology, the less time Grandma has to set the neighbors’ trees on fire. Still, they make new memories as long as they have each other, indoors or outdoors.

And so that was RansomWHERE? A fun little musical that I found relatable in more ways than one. It was also an excellent note to end the season on. My only compliant, and this is hardly unique to RansomWHERE?, is that I wish the full Bite-Size Broadway theme song played at the start of the episodes. They did that for the first few episodes, but they don’t any more. I like the full theme song! But, that’s a minor complaint in the grand scheme of things.

 

And so that was all that episodes that are out so far from Bite-Sized Broadway. A musical snack that keeps you coming back. It is a fantastic musical anthology podcast, and I can't recommend it enough. We've had a fantastic first season, and I can’t wait to see what season 2 has to bring. Speaking of which, do you have an idea for a mini-musical? Well, Bite-Sized Broadway is taking submissions. Who knows, maybe your idea will be an episode on season 2. 

Well, I think that should do it from me for now. I will see you guys next time.

The Audio File: Bite-Sized Broadway Part 1

I really like musicals, but I can't always get to the theatre, especially these days. Usually, I'm limited to listening to the albums, supplemented by summaries of the plot, and occasionally a bit of bootleg footage or pictures. However, audio dramas present a unique opportunity for musicals to reach a wider audience. You get the singing and the talks bits. Sure, there's no visuals, but when it comes to musicals it's the audio that really counts. I bring this up because we'll be taking a look at a musical anthology audio drama. We're taking a look at Bite-Sized Broadway. 

Bite-Sized Broadway is an anthology of mini-musicals. Each musical differs in style, music, and length. Shows run anywhere from seventeen to thirty-two minutes. The remaining time is spent on an interview with the creators of the musicals. The interviews are conducted by Jonathan Lynch. I was first made aware of Bite-Sized Broadway when I was contacted by Andrew Fox on Reddit. He's the sound engineer for the podcast, and is responsible for coordinating the musical scores in each episode. He's also an alumnus from Team StarKid. Team StarKid were an indie theatre troop who produced several parody musicals beloved across the Internet and beyond. Their works include A Very Potter Musical, Holy Musical B@tman, Starship, Twisted, The Trail to Oregon, and Me and My Dick. And yes, that last one is indeed the tittle of a musical. 
 
Andrew had read some of my previous review I posed in r/audiodrama, and asked if I'd be willing to take a look at Bite-Sized Broadway. I said yes, and now here we are. Well, a former member of Team StarKid has asked me to review an audio drama he was involved in. I guess I'm in the big leagues now. Well, actually, I knew I was getting in the big leagues when I got asked to review another audio drama. I can't tell you what it is just yet, but it does have some reasonably well-known actors from Hollywood attached to it. That's the only clue you get right now. But, let us focus on the present, and Bite-Sized Broadway. We'll jump straight in to the first episode. 
 
Well, actually, before that, just a quick aside. I absolutely adore the theme song that plays at the beginning and ending of each episode. Each episode has their own personalized posters, and they're all great. In fact, if you listen on Spotify, the image you get will be each episode’s poster, rather than the series title card. But we're getting off-track. To the first musical we go. 
 
Our first mini-musical is tilted The Getaway. Peter is a former New York City taxi driver who now works for Uber. In fact, it's his first day on the new job. He feels that life is moving too fast, and he just wants to somewhere he can get away from it all. Specially, he wants to take his wife on a nice vacation. If only he had the money. But little does he know that all of that is about to change. Little does Peter know that his first pair of riders have recently robbed a bank. 
 
Bite-Sized Broadway starts off strong with great first episode. The start of this episode reminded me a bit about a trip they took to New Orleans for work. They used rideshare companies like Uber and Lyft to get around the city. One of their drivers mentioned that he used to be a taxi driver, but competition from rideshares forced him to join the competition. He only makes half of what he did when he was a taxi driver, but it was that or unemployment. It strikes me that Peter is in a similar situation to that man. Though, honestly, I would have thought New York would have been less effected than most places. Taxis are such an iconic part of New York; you'd think the city would preserve and/or subsidize them; especially since they could serve as a tourist attraction. 
 
At one time, most major cities in America used streetcars as a form of public transportation. However, most of these got replaced by buses and cars. New Orleans was a rather notable exception to this trend.  This is thanks in large part to the streetcar preservation movement that emerged in the city.  To this day streetcar still play a role in New Orleans public transportation, and are a minor tourist attraction associated with the city. This is to say that I can see something like that happening with the taxis of New York. 
 
Now then, let's talk about the music. The musical starts off with a great opening number called "Moving Too Fast/Getaway." It's a bombastic opening number, which contrasts with the lyrics about how Peter feels that the world is moving too fast and leaving him behind. It was probably my favorite song from this episode. Why no, the fact that I often feel like Peter played no role in that; why do you ask? 
 
Next up we have "The Perfect Getaway (Bank Robber Bebop)." It's a jazzy, bouncy, upbeat number evocative of the musicals of the 1930s and 1940s. I really enjoyed this one as well. The banks robbers’ song about how they just need to lay low, and hope Peter doesn't get pulled over, and they'll have pulled off the perfect crime. At the same time, Peter sings about how he hopes to save up enough to take his wife on a nice vacation. 
 
Our closing number is "Would It Be Wrong/Getaway (Reprise)." Peter has finally connected the dots, and he's also holding the robbers' bad of unmarked bills. Would it be so wrong to look the other way? The music starts slow and contemplative as Peter wrestles with his dilemma. Then it turns triumphant and upbeat as he decides, to hell with it, he's taking the money, and taking his wife on a great vacation. The robbers also sing triumphantly about how they've gotten away with it all. So, this musical is three of three on songs I liked. 
 
And indeed, Peter and the robbers are about to go on the trip of a life time. Their destination includes room and board, with three hot pre-paid meal each day. They will enjoy extensive workout routines, numerous crafting opportunities, and plenty of alone time to just relax and meditate on life. The rooms...leaving something to be desired, but hey, you can't win them all. That's right, they're going on an all-expense paid trip...to prison! Hey, all I'm saying is that the musical ends with the police arriving, and Peter is holding a bag of stolen money. That's going to look very suspicious. I don't think "Please, Officer, you have to believe me! I'm just an innocent bystander!" is going to cut it. At absolute best, Peter will be back to square one. But hey, it makes for an amusing end. 
 
As you can see, I greatly enjoyed The Getaway. It was an excellent first episode. Short but sweet, and a lot of fun. 
 
Our second musical is Blue Cross Blues. Bill and Michelle are just an average American couple dealing with the realities of modern life. This includes expensive insurance premiums. On day, Bill decides that he's going to get them a reimbursement from their medical insurer. However, he's about to find out that this is easier said than done. 
 
Bite-Sized Broadway started strong with an excellent first episode, but can it top it? As it runs out, yes it can. Quite well in fact. First off, I'll say that it was interesting to have odder characters as the protagonists. You don't often see that in musicals. They're also an older interracial couple, which is even rarer. I also felt that the musical did a good job of being evenhanded. It satirizes the healthcare debate, but it pokes fun at both sides, and doesn't come down firmly on either side. Well, maybe a bit towards the idea of a government healthcare system, but the musical does point out that such a thing isn't without its flaws. Now then, let's move on to the songs. 
 
Our first song is "How Hard Can It Be?" It's a smooth, cool, and triumphant opening number that sets up the plot. Bill and Michelle get into an argument about who contributes more to the household: Bill with his landscape paintings or Michelle and her lawyer job? Bill has full confidence that it's going to be easy, but Michelle has her doubts. 
 
Next, we have "Waiting #1." It's a transitional number involving Bill and Michelle waiting to see if the letter Bill sent to the insurance company worked. Survey says...no reply. Nothing too fancy here, but it gets the job done. I'll save us trouble and say here that "Waiting #2" is much the same. 
 
"Billing Codes" happens after Bill calls the insurance agency. It starts off almost like a church hymn, but quickly turns into a bouncy marching number. This song reminded me of something that happened in my life. A few years ago, I needed to get jaw surgery to correct faulty orthodontics. Naturally, that meant my parents had to spar with their health insurance provider. The insurance company did everything to avoid paying. Thankfully, my dad eventually wrote a letter so through and convincing in its reasoning that the insurance company had no choice but to pay up. It helps that both of my parents are lawyers who work for the State of Louisiana, and they're privy to a lot of this sort of stuff. So, I got my surgery, made a full recovery, and my parents didn't have to pay any money for it. 
 
I also liked how the song lists all the random things that the hospitals bill for. A big reason healthcare is so expensive in America is that the hospitals got in bed with the insurance companies. The insurance companies are required to pay a minimum amount for certain things, so the hospitals deliberately jack-up the prices so that they can get more money from the insurance companies. 
 
"Pay The Bill" see Bill finally get in contact with the billing department. Unfortunately, it doesn't quite go as he'd hope. It's a tango villain song. I'm with the musical's creators, Neil Radisch and Ed Levy, tango makes for an excellent villain song. Also, having the billing department being connected to the Sisters of the Merciful Dollar, as noted above, makes perfect sense. As a side note, one of the best depictions of the health insurance industry I've ever seen was The Incredibles. Specifically, the scene where Mr. Incredible is working for the insurance company and the boss says, basically, "How are we supposed to make money when you keep approving everyone?!" 
 
"Waiting #3" is much like its predecessors. However, this time the check comes at long last: the princely sum of fifty-six cents. Wow, that's like slightly more than half of one whole dollar! That's also...uh, way less than even a fraction of one percent of what Bill and Michelle owe. It just now occurred to me that the fact that the husband is named Bill is a pun. Sometimes I'm a bit slow on the uptake. 
 
"Government Healthcare" is our closing number. Bill and Michelle face the music: they must become Democrats and support government healthcare. It's a bouncy, patriotic marching song. It's also an awesome note to end the musical on. The cast sing about how it will lead to more people getting the help they need, and how healthcare should be a right, not a privilege. However, they also concede that taxes will rise, implementing it will be very expensive, and that it might lead to hospitals and EMTs becomes much less speedy and less efficient. Not mentioned, but worth considering, is that private insurance would still exist. Canada has government healthcare, but it is to supplement, not replace, private insurance. 
 
And going back to my surgery, what if a government healthcare system deemed it cosmetic, and not worth paying for? Then my folks would still have had to spare with private insurance. There aren't easy answers, and I like that the musical leaves it to the audience to decide for themselves. All in all, Blue Cross Blues is a fantastic second episode. In fact, I didn't listen to the episodes in order, so this was my first episode. And it was a great musical to have for my first taste of Bite-Sized Broadway. 
 
Our third episode is titled A Relative Relationship. Simon Pang and Carmen Solidad couldn't be more different. She's one of the most popular girls at school, and he's a nerd. They're also step-siblings, something neither of the, is happy about. They've been called to the vice principal's office because one of them cheated off the other's test. They've been tasked with determining who takes the blame, but little do they know that they're also about to see a different side of each other. 
 
I wouldn't exactly say that this musical broke any new ground. I've seen similar plots to this done before. I see shades of The Breakfast Club here. Still, familiar doesn't equal bad, but I still rather enjoyed this musical. Having the main characters be step-siblings was an interesting touch. In the interview, musical creator Timothy Huang mentions that the actors are adults, despite the characters being in middle school, because certain lines would be less funny if the characters were played by actual kids. I guess I didn't pick up on that during my first listen. Well, I knew the actors were older than middle school age, but I guess it didn't faze me as weird. Theatre often requires you to use your imagination and suspend your disbelief to bring the story on the stage to life. Now then, let's move on to the songs. 
 
Our first song is "My Mom is Gonna Kill Me." The upbeat music contrasts with Simon and Carmen worrying about how their parents will react when they find out about getting called to the vice principal. Also, we learn that Simon is Korean-America, as he mentions that his mom grew up near the DMZ. It's a fun way to start the musical and establish the characters. 
 
The second song is "It Should Be You/I've been Despised For So Long." We get accordions, trumpets, snare drums, and even a bit of bass as Carmen and Simon debate about who should take the fall. Well, Carmen was the one who did it, no questions asked, but she's already on academic probation and doesn't want to get expelled. For if that happens, her prospects are...not very good. This song leads us directly into... 
 
"It Happens Every Day" is our third song. Carmen blames Simon for introducing their parents to each other. He retorts with a barb about how her mom walked out on her dad. This genuinely hurts Carmen, and Simon immediately feels regret for crossing the line. The song is slow and gentle about how Carmen blames herself for her mom walking out. We also see how her confidence and bravado is just a mask to disguise her insecurity about how she feels she constantly screws up and makes bad choices. Yeah, I can relate to that. Though, I still have both of my parents. I'm often told I obsess to a fault over my faults, mistakes, and screw-ups. 
 
Simon also reveals his own insecurities about how he feels pressured to pass ever test and do well in school for his mom's sake. I guess if there is a moral to this song, it is that you should be kind to others. You don't know what they're going through. Also, everyone has hidden depths and insecurities. Nobody is ever all that they seem. 
 
"Rain" is an orchestral number that ends the musical. Simon and Carmen have both grown as people, and both gained a deeper and understanding and compassion for each other. Short, but it does the job. 
 
I guess that summaries my feelings about A Relative Relationship. It was short, but it had a lot of heart. This was the episodes where I went "Goodness! Some of these episodes barely have any musical in them!" But, on the other hand, I think this musical was probably exactly the length it needed to be. We're three for three with great mini-musicals. 
 
Episode four is titled The Last Magic Negro (Or Chad's Great Awokening). Chad is a middle manager at a company that has found itself swept up in the George Floyd Protests. Chad has been tasked with helping make the company more accommodation to black employees. Unfortunately, he has no clue how to do this. Thankfully, he can call on the help of Jimmy Bagger, the last magical negro in the world. But Chad always finds a way to completely botch Jimmy's advice. The question remains: what is Chad going to do. 
 
This musical was written by Jamil Ellis and Andrew Fox. When Andrew first pitched Bite-Sized Broadway to me, he recommended this musical in particular. He told me not to be put off by the title. Apparently, he meant the word negro. I mean, I wasn't offended, but then again, I'm not exactly politically correct. No, the word I was more wary of was awokening, emphasis on woke. As I've already said, I am not exactly what you might call politically correct. 
 
I'll admit, I have mixed feelings about this one. When I first listened to this musical, I gave it a rather unfavorable review. However, after a brief chat with Andrew, I decided to give it another listen. I liked it much better the second time round. 
 
Whenever you produce art based around hot button social issues/movements, you're going to invoke some strong emotional responses from people. It doesn't matter how delicately to treat your subject; press the hot button, and you run the risk of getting burned. Or at least, you'll potentially run into people who are burned out by it all. Now, that isn't to say that it is impossible to write a meaningful, and even-handed, story using touchy issues. Indeed, some of the greatest works of art have dealt with controversial subjects. I guess what I'm saying is, tread carefully, and know both your intended audience and your potential audience. 
 
When I first listened to The Last Magic Negro my initial response was "Oh, great. Another 'woke costal progressives assume their experiences with racism apply to all of America' show." I will admit, in hindsight this was a knee-jerk reaction, and there was evidence against of I'd had a clearer mindset. According to Andrew, the musical is very much aimed at a coastal left-wing progressive audience. As such, Chad is not meant to represent all white people, as I initially believed him to be. If the target audience is coastal progressives, then I think Last Magical Negro will do quite well. However, when you release an audio drama you're playing for a, potentially, global audience. Or at least, an audience outside your immediate area. I was willing to give this musical another go, but not all listeners are going to be as forgiving. It also helped that I had direct contact with Andrew, something most listeners would lack. 
 
The Last Magic Negro does have some good moments of satire. At the start of the musical, one of Chad's fellow employees brags that she's raising awareness and fighting racism by sharing internet articles and think pieces. Chad retorts that she wore blackface for Halloween last year. It funny, and groan-worthy, on two levels. The first bit pokes fun at internet slacktivism but the second but has a fair bit of truth as well. 
 
I remember, during my senior year of high school I was scrolling through Facebook and saw some pictures my classmates had taken from a party they had. The girls dressed as jungle princesses, and the boys...wore blackface; full-body blackface. Oh, did I mention I went to a Catholic school in North Louisiana full of rich kids? I wasn't exactly a social butterfly, so I didn't get invited to this party, nor was I looking for an invite. Clearly, I wasn't missing very much. I was also one of the not-so-rich kids who went to that particularly school. Oh, and here's the cherry on top, many of those same classmates would later go on to make post paying lip service to Black Lives Matter last year. I sure hope none of them go into politics or entertainment, because those pictures are going to bite them in the asses sooner or later. 
 
Another part, where I didn't know if I should laugh or cry, is where Chad really devotes himself to becoming an ally. He rallies his troops and...violently smashes and destroys buildings and property within the very black communities he claims he wants to help. He also interrupts peaceful protests and set stuff on fire. Yeah, rather unfortunately that happened frequently during the protests. Anarchist groups, such as ANTIFA, destroyed property, including black owned businesses...just because really. Some people just want to watch the world burn. Said anarchist groups were almost exclusively made up of upper middle class and rich white “progressive” people. However, there were also groups unaffiliated with the anarchist who also looted and destroyed stuff, including black businesses, because...uh, well, you got me there. Not sure what the thinking was, or if they were thinking at all.
 
There's also a funny scene where Chad tries to find black people to listen to. Problem is, he doesn't know any. He gets so desperate he calls Bank of America. The representative asks why he thinks she's black, and he says because she sounds black. It goes about as well as you might expect. 
 
The music of this musical is quite good, and a good variety of styles. As one would expect from a production co-produced by an alumnus of Team StarKid. "What Are You Going to Do?" is a slow R&B number where Chad's co-worker Monique asks the titular question. How are Chad, and the company, going to address racism and discrimination? "Magical Negro Jingle", the song where Jimmy first appears, is pretty clearly a spoof of The Reading Rainbow theme song. And that's what makes it so much fun. "Listen" is done in the style of a gospel number. "Use Your Voice" is another upbeat funky song where Jimmy tells Chad to, well, use his voice and speak out against racism. "The Glory" is done in the style of an 80s movie montage song. It's the song where Chad goes off the deep end with his activism. The guy who sings it is even credited as 80s Guy. "Make A Change" is another spoof, this time of the Michael Jackson song "Man in the Mirror." 
 
Okay, all well and good, but I still took issue with certain points in the musical. At one point, Chad confronts his shadow archetype. The shadow says Chad is racist because he says the word nigger when singing along to rap song. If he doesn't mean it with malicious intent, I fail to see the problem. Hey, here's a crazy idea. If black people don't want white people to say nigger, maybe black people shouldn't say nigger either. Just a thought. 
  
And this is more of a minor point, but perhaps Jimmy could have been a bit more specific when he told Chad to listen to black people. What if he'd listened to one of that crazy black conservatives like Candice Owens or Larry Elder? Or worse, what if he listened to black anti-Semites like the Black Hebrew Israelites or Louis Farrakhan?  Granted, the musical would get extremely dark if, for example, Chad got radicalized and committed a synagogue shooting. I'm just saying, maybe Jimmy's problem wasn't just that Chad wasn't listening, but that he was too vague in his direction. At the end we do see that he has his reasons for this, but you'd think he'd be worried about the potential collateral damage Chad might cause. 
 
Okay, so what is my final verdict here? The Last Magic Negro isn't completely flawless, but it is a lot better than I initially believed it to be. Upon further review, I think I'm going to give this on a thumbs up. However, that comes with the caveat that Andrew and Jamil should remember to proceed with caution in the future. Remember, when you're making an audio drama, the whole world is potentially listening. I was willing to give them a second chance, and the benefit the doubt, but not all listeners will be that charitable or forgiving. But all that having been said, give this musical a listen and see what you think of it. 
 
Our fifth musical is Toy Box. Velveteen is a toy rabbit who loves his boy dearly. However, he has recently found himself place in a toy chest. Fortunately, he's not alone. There is tank, a no-nonsense remote controlled toy tank. There's also Horse, an old wise skin horse. Velveteen must come to terms with that fact that his boy might be gone for good. He must find meaning in a life without his beloved boy. 
 
Ah, now this is what I call a pallet cleanser. I think it's inevitable that this musical invites comparisons to the Toy Story franchise. Specifically, to Toy Story 3. You have the themes of toys trying to navigate through life after their owners have outgrown them. However, I feel that Toy Box takes a more introspective and melancholy approach to the subject matter. It's reminds me a bit of something I read once discussing the different philosophical approaches of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its spin-off series Angel. Buffy has sort of a Judeo-Christian perspective; evil is powerful, and bad things happen to good people, but evil can be overcome if you fight hard and persevere. Angel, by contrast, takes cues from Norse Mythology. Evil may never truly be defeat. You will have small victories, but you will also be forced to make great sacrifices. However, the world is still worth fighting for, and you can find meaning in the struggle. 
 
I guess Toy Box is like Angel, and Toy Story is like Buffy, in terms of outlook. The conflict here is of the toys finding meaning in their lives, even though the boy is probably never coming back. This musical is, well, I wouldn't say an adaption of The Velveteen Rabbit. Only in a very, very loose sense. Rather, it's inspired by it, and takes some cues, but mostly tells its own story. Now then, let's move on to the music. 
 
Our first song is "The Boyhood Army." It's an upbeat marching song as Tank explains to Velveteen that they protect the boy. They protect him from mean kids on the playground who scrape his knees, and even from his own parents, but only when they're mad. Tank treats it like being in an actual army, but Horse wishes he'd just give it a rest already. 
 
The next song is "Hop/Never Stop Loving." Tank is applauded that Velveteen can't hop, despite being a rabbit. Velveteen is determined to hop, and yet he also wonders about just what it means to be a rabbit. Is it hopping, floppy ears, and a twitchy nose? I liked how Horse snarks at all the macho stuff Tank says. In fact, I think Horse was my favorite character in this musical. Eventually, Horse points out to Velveteen that is strength isn't being able to hop, it's being able to love. For it is only when a child truly loves you that a toy becomes real. Horse also reveals that he used to belong to the boy's nephew. You get a real sense that he still a bit sad that the uncle is gone, but he knows that the love they shared will always remain. 
 
Song number three is "What Do You Do?" Tank's batteries are starting to give out, and he's terrified. It's strongly implied that his bravado is just a mask to disguise his insecurity and fears. The boy isn't coming back, and Tank knows it, even though he doesn't want to admit it. Admittedly, it is a little weird that Tank's life is tied to his batteries. Velveteen and Horse don't have batteries, but that doesn't slow them down. Then again, this is a musical about living toys, so I say just roll with it. On a grander scale, the toys ponder how they will find meaning in their lives now that the boy doesn't need them anymore. 
 
"Finale: Boyhood Army (reprise)" closes us out. Velveteen convinces the toys that they can find meaning by being there for each other. They all have flaws, but they can all still love, and the boy will live on in their hearts. They can still be an army for themselves. 
 
Well now, Toy Box was a surprisingly heartfelt musical. The premise could easily have been played for laughs, but Teresa Lotz and Will Buck made something really special. They said they'd been sitting on their idea for many years, and I can certainly say it was worth the wait. This was specially a Christmas episode, but it can be enjoyed at any time of the year. And can be enjoyed by listeners of all ages. Now, if you'll excuses me, I have to go hug my stuffy wooly mammoth and my rubber Parasaurolophus. I should probably find the rubber T-Rex, my plastic bugs, and my Thomas the Tank Engine trains too. 
 
And so that was all that episodes that are out so far from Bite-Sized Broadway. The review was getting a bit long, so I split it in two for ease of reading. Don't forget to checkout part two. 

Bite-Sized Broadway is a musical snack that keeps you coming back. It is a fantastic musical anthology podcast, and I can't recommend it enough. We've had some really great shows so far, and from the looks of things, we've got even more great musicals on the way. And I can't wait to discover them all. Go ahead and listen today, you'll be glad that you did. 
 
Well, I think that should do it from me for now. I will see you guys next time.